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Introduction
As has been mentioned earlier, the ultimate goal of human life according to Hinduism is God-realisation. Hinduism assures that both householders and monks can realise God if they sincerely follow their own spiritual ideal. Many of the spiritually-illumined sages of ancient India such as Ashvapati and King Janaka were family men.
Hinduism offers two major spiritual paths or sets of religious duties – one for householders and the other for monks. The path for householders is called Pravritti Marga or “the path of permitted sensual desires.” The path for monks is Nivritti Marga or “the path of renunciation of sensual desires.”
Pravritti Marga – The Path of Permitted Sensual Desires
According to the Mahanirvana-Tantra the following are the duties of a householder They fall under the category of Pravritti Marga.
The goal of a householder is to realise God. To achieve this goal he should perform all his duties as enjoined by the scriptures. He should constantly work by surrendering the fruits of his actions to God. He should earn a living through honest means and remember that his life is meant for the service of God and the poor and helpless. He should always try to please his parents, looking upon them as tangible representatives of God. In the presence of his parents a householder must not joke, be frivolous, or show anger. If his parents come when he is sitting, he must rise as a mark of respect and honour. He may resume his seat only when asked by his parents to do so.
A householder must not eat before providing food for his parents, his wife and children, and the poor. He should undergo a thousand troubles in order to serve his parents because he must not forget that he owes his body to them.
He must never scold, hurt the feelings of his wife, or show anger towards her. He must always take care of her as if she were his own mother. He must maintain complete fidelity to his wife. He will go to the darkest hell if he craves even mentally for another woman. He must always please his wife with money, clothes, love, faithfulness; and sweet words, and never do anything to hurt her. A man who has succeeded in getting the love of his chaste wife has indeed got the blessings of his religion and acquired all virtues.
A householder must never use improper language in the presence of women nor should he brag about his achievements. He must not say, “I have done this, and I have done that.” He must not talk in public of his own fame, nor should he brag about his wealth, power or position. He must not talk about his poverty either. Neither must he divulge to others what someone has confided in him.
He must not give excessive attention to food, clothes or his external appearance. He should maintain the cleanliness of his body, and his heart should be pure. He should always be enthusiastic and active. He must be brave and should fight to resist his enemies like a hero. He must not act like a coward and try to rationalise his cowardice by talking about non-resistance or non-violence. To this friends and relatives, however, he will be as gentle as a lamb.
These will be his duties, in regard to his children:
He should lovingly bring up his son until he is four. Then the son should be properly educated until he is sixteen. When the son is twenty he should be employed in some work and be treated by his father as his equal. His daughter should also be treated and educated the same way. At the time of her marriage her father should give her jewelry and money.
The householder should also take care of his brothers and sisters and their children if they are poor. He has similar duties toward his other relatives, friends and servants, and the people of his own village. If a householder be rich and yet does not help his needy relatives and the poor, he is considered a brute and not a human being.
A householder must never show respect to the wicked nor condone wickedness. He must respect those who are good and endowed with noble qualities. He should enter into friendship with only those who are reliable. Before befriending them he should carefully judge them by their dealings with other people.
He must make sincere and honest efforts to acquire a good name. He must speak the truth. His words should be pleasant and beneficial to others. He must not gamble, and must not be the cause of trouble to others.
A householder who does not struggle to become wealthy through honest means is failing in his moral duty. If he is lazy and leads an idle life, he should be considered immoral. He must be enthusiastic in earning money in order to help others who depend on him.
A householder should engage in social service for the benefit of people. He should excavate reservoirs to provide water for drinking and irrigation, plant shade-trees by the roadside for pedestrians, build shelters for travellers, and construct roads and bridges. Such selfless actions will help the householder to attain the same spiritual goal as the greatest yogi.
Nivritti Marga – The Path of Renunciation of Sensual Desires
The path for all-renouncing monks, Nivritti Marga, is quite different from that of the householders. A monk, avowed to celibacy, should be physically and mentally pure. He should respect every woman, looking upon her as his own mother. Following the ancient tradition, he should maintain his body by begging food from householders, lead a life of simplicity, and spend most of his time in the contemplation of God and study of the scriptures. He should not own any home, wealth or property. He should live in a hut, a temple, or under a tree. He must be truthful, nonviolent, serene of mind, and full of compassion for all beings. He should never go to see a king or such dignitaries. If they want they can come and see him, and he should treat them with the same kindness with which he must treat everyone. He should give the same good behaviour to all, whether poor or rich, good or wicked. He must be indifferent to praise, blame, pleasure or pain, His only goal in life should be the realisation of God.